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Last updated: December 10th, 2017
Whatever the reason was for you to stumble on this page, be it intentional or not, the topic of not giving a fuck is an issue that resides among many people. It’s how people care so much about what others do, say or think about them, something or someone else.
It’s said that as you grow older and get more life experience, you slowly stop to give a fuck about what people think about your actions. Maybe that’s why parents can be embarrassing in public in front of their children and not care. But what’s this life experience that you go through to get to that stage? I’ll let you know now that it’s not something that can happen by reading an article like this but being given advice and made aware of it can definitely help the process.
The first thing you have to overcome is your mental self. Life definitely does get better when you don’t give a fuck because you aren’t confined to this bubble of expectations where you need to follow a certain regime and essentially become a sheep. For some people, they’re tired of being the sheep. They hate being the sheep. They want to be a wolf. A wolf doesn’t give a fuck what a sheep does or thinks because it’s a wolf. Life is a wolf and like Denzel Washington said, “it takes a wolf to catch a wolf”. So if you’re tired of being treated like a sheep, this is your training day.
“I can’t do that because it’s not cool”. We’ve probably said this to ourselves out loud in some form and not giving a fuck doesn’t mean to completely ruin your street cred but it’s the confidence of thinking “I don’t care what people think if I do this”. That’s what not giving a fuck is about.
What many wolves have figured out is that people constantly judge you. No matter what you do, you could be the humblest person in the world, help everyone, the community and never say or do anything bad but someone could come along and say “he’s too nice, it’s weird”. You have to understand that you can’t please everyone and you should be okay with that. For people who don’t care, people judging them is the same as an ant crawling past. They don’t notice it. They don’t even acknowledge it. That should be your approach to negative comments, don’t retaliate, that’s what they want, to get a reaction from you. Understand that you don’t need to be liked by everyone and you would be one step closer to your goal. By not being phased by these negative comments you can focus on the better things in your life which will ultimately result in a happier life.
How do you take that next step in this process? Listen to what you say and do around people you admire, look up to or impress. You need to catch yourself seeking approval. For example, if you hear that person saying “I like this TV show” and you, never watching an episode are about to say “me too!” catch yourself and acknowledge you were about to say that to be liked more by that person. Unknowingly if you did say “me too”you will get a high inside of feeling accepted and part of the group. This high only lasts for a split second, it doesn’t last. It’s not long-term and the person you got the high from doesn’t care if you liked the TV show. By catching yourself seeking this approval, you will have completed this step which will ultimately get you one step closer to your end goal.
You can take it one step further by numbing yourself to the judgemental eyes of others. Dancing or singing in public is the perfect baby step to take. Expressing your inner self whether you’re a good at it or not is how you become your own individual. If you have your headphones in and your singing and dancing, people will smile because it’s funny, they may even record you and that could be someone’s worst nightmare but will they care in a month? No, they have more important things to deal with. Will it matter to you? Yes, because it would have made you one step closer to being a more confident person, you’ve danced and sang in public. Public speaking and standing up for yourself is no biggie now. As you do more daring acts of self-expression, the taunts and laughter of people won’t affect you in any way.
This works with what has been mentioned above about doing things you consider embarrassing. Your actions create your persona. What’s the reason to be a plain Jane? To be no different to the next person? Because being in the middle is the safest place to be? If you believe you were born to not make a difference, not leave a legacy or a name for yourself before you die, maybe being in the middle is enough for you. But people who have changed the world either for good or bad were not satisfied being in the middle. Look at Arnold Schwarzenegger, look at Sylvester Stallone. There are so many people who started off with nothing and made something for themselves. They are considered champions, people to look up to, to admire and be like. They are great influencers who help others peruse their goals and dreams.
All these points mentioned above and below overlap in one way or another. All the greatest influencers in the world did what they did because they didn’t give a fuck and look where it got them. A lot of people can’t settle for average. Being different is an investment, a risk, the payoff is a more confident individual who has influence and power. People look up to them and all it took were baby steps to stand out in the crowd, to be different, to be the wolf among the sheep.
Goals are what drives you in life. It has been overused in social media with people saying “this is goals” and “omg goals!!!1!” but in reality, you should have your own. In a way it’s like a bucket list, write down everything you want to achieve, financial, relationship, life, materialistic things, write down everything. Don’t tell or show anyone the list, but use it as a platform to know what you want to achieve. By having goals that you dedicate your life around will make you not care about outside negativity, essentially not giving a fuck about people’s opinions.
I understand that right now, life is down. Whatever the reason be, you couldn’t get the girl/guy, no friends or people don’t respect you, don’t waste your time on them. Move on, life will get better and you can tell yourself that it won’t hundreds of times but can you tell the future? Just knowing or just having a feeling isn’t a high probability that it won’t. Its good to have a detox and get rid of all the bad influences in your life. Starting over, making new friends that respect you and are positive will reflect on you. Your life is your life and you are in charge of it. Stop blaming people for the bad days and do something to make it good. Even a small act of making yourself better will snowball and before you know it, you will be in a better place. Understand that it all comes down to you and your approach to this. People can tell you the best advice in the world and you can absorb all that information in. But until you actually start putting it into action, it will merely be something you’re aware of. If you don’t believe me, just try it out. Life is too short to be scared. Believe you are a wolf and you will be the wolf, metaphorically.
If you would like to read a little more into this topic, we have chosen three books below that might spark your interest.
Click the link below to buy The subtle art of not giving a fuck.
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
Click the link below to buy How to not give a F.
How to Not Give a F: Understanding & Defeating Social Anxiety
Click the link below to buy The life-changing magic of not giving a f*ck.
The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck: How to Stop Spending Time You Don’t Have with People You Don’t Like Doing Things You Don’t Want to Do (A No F*cks Given Guide)